Life prepares us surprises everyday. Some days we notice them, some days we pass them and life itself... Some days are better than others.. This is why.
Some people believe that everything happens for a reason, some believe that it's faith, psychiatrists believe it's subconsiousness... I believe we decide every morning when we wake up. Everyday should be lived on that day. No past no future...
One morning I woke up and wanted to live life fully. Just like it comes. It took me to Nepal, to find myself. It came to me as a surprise I was already there. Waiting for me.
No I don't have a personality split disorder. I just tend to let myself go. So I let myself go that day all the way to Nepal. Some times you have to let go, let life take you where it wants without concerning about it. Get angry at someone and just leave, open your eyes in a country you don't know anything about. It is not as hard as it seems, all you need is a ticket. All the places really worth going are not that popular so you don't have to pay a fortune for the ticket. Just make sure the journey is what matters not the estimated place of arrival.
One day a friend of mine was telling me about the full eclipse in 2009, which was going to be seen very good in Nepal. Next thing I know I was googling Nepal, Volunteer work. A few weeks later I was being picked up by the organization members at Kathmandu Tribuvan airport. During those weeks I had my vaccinations done, got my ticket and everything I needed. 12 May 2008 at exactly 19.00 I was on the road again... Well turn the page then...
Ofcourse it is not this simple. There is a past to it. Hundreds of years actually. It is in my gens. I have decendents who left their countries and homes to move to places they didn't know. I have a family in which every generation was born in different countries. I have blood which is not stoppable. I have a grandfather who went to Norway for the second world war, got imprisoned by the Germans, found out every imprisoned soldier was being exiled to Sibiria when they came back, and decided to stay in Germany then moved to Malatya then back to Germany, instead of going back to Azerbeijan. I have another grandfather who was sent all the way to Istanbul from Sivas so he would be far away from the murderers of his father and a blood fuse could be prevented. I have a grandmother whose mother was exiled to Sibiria for being from the royal blood and run away from there on horse carriage with 3 children to Chekoslovakia and had to run away to Germany when komunizm followed her, who lived in Chekoslovakia and then moved to Germany and later to Turkiye and back to Germany with her husband. I have another grandmother whose family moved all the way from Yugoslavia to Istanbul so later she met my grandfather and moved to Karabuk... I have a mother who was born in Malatya, married in Munich, divorced in Antalya and never lived anywhere more than 17 years, I have a father who was born in Karabuk, married in Munich divorced in Antalya (obviously) who lives in Karabuk now... I have relatives in Germany, United States, France, Russia, Azerbeijan, Turkey. So I always want to go live somewhere else then where ever I am. I wish it was possible to live everywhere...
Quantum physics says it is, but that is another story...
We should do what we feel like. If there is a place you want to go, go now... If there is something you want to do, do now.... If there is someone you want to love, love now... Don't be scared to leave your heart somewhere or at someone... It doesn't get smaller, it only gets bigger...
I left my heart in Nepal, with the women and the children I taught. I came back and I grew. Now I have a even bigger heart, ready to go again, ready to love again...
Well one day I went to Nepal... That's how it all started..
At the door steps of a villiage house in Nepal, Chitwan, Pathiani, Patalahara.
The house in the photograph to be more precise.
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